When my baby was just over a year and a half old, my stomach started getting very big. I just knew I was pregnant, although I did not feel too nauseated. So my husband and I stopped using condoms because we thought we were going to have another baby. However, it turns out that I was having problems with digestion, and most likely I was not pregnant until we stopped using condoms.

It was more soon after our other baby than we have planned to have another, but we adjusted to that. The problem was that I got very sick to my stomach. For weeks I could hardly keep anything down, then at the end I could not even keep water down. My baby stopped walking and playing. She would just sit quietly all day next to the couch and wait for me to get better. It broke my heart to see her looking so sad.

I went to the obstetrician, and she said that I might need to be in the hospital for the rest of my pregnancy. My husband is a good father but not nearly as attentive and patient a parent as I am, and besides he was working full-time. He said he would go along with whatever I decided. For me it was not a wrenching decision at all. I was not willing to jeopardize the child I had for another one.

The procedure was quick but uncomfortable, and I had cramps for a day or two, then I felt normal very soon. Even right after the procedure I was able to eat some ice cream. My husband was with me for the abortion, and my sister watched the baby. The obstetrician did the procedure, and at the clinic everyone treated me kindly. I am very grateful there were no protesters etc. those years (although it would have not changed my mind at all).

I have never regretted my decision to have an abortion. I know many people think it is bad, but I was a good mother and took good care of the baby that I had. She soon went back to acting like a jolly baby, and all I felt was a huge relief that we had not had to go through the traumas that loomed ahead if we had kept the baby. It’s possible that it would not all have been as drastic as the obstetrician forecast, but it would have been a gritty experience and would have damaged our family. Of course sometimes I wonder if it had been a boy or a girl, and thought how old that baby would be now. But I have always been at peace with the decision we made at that time.