01.05.2015
Media

Anonymous

I was 16 years old and in high school. I was in my first real relationship, but with a guy I think I knew I wouldn’t be with forever. I was in love with him, but also knew he lied to me and cheated on me regularly.

I had always practiced safe sex but one night we had sex and the condom broke. I don’t know why but in that instant I thought crap, I’m going to get pregnant. Sure enough a few weeks later when I didn’t get my period I took a home pregnancy test and it was positive. I was only 16. I had a whole life ahead of me. I wanted to go to university and have a career. I knew I wanted to be a mother one day, but at 16 I was not ready.

It didn’t take long for me to decide that I wouldn’t have the baby. My boyfriend was fine with my decision – he could barely hold down a job so I’m sure he was relieved I didn’t want the baby. We went to a clinic and talked to a counsellor and set up an appointment for my abortion. I only told a few close friends. I remember the days and weeks leading up to the appointment being terrible. I didn’t want a baby yet. I wasn’t ready.
I had my abortion at 12 weeks. The procedure went fine and afterwards I went to a friend’s house to sleep and rest and that evening went back to my home where I lived with my parents. They never knew what had happened and still don’t.
I’m now 40 years old and married. I have a 3 1/2 year old beautiful son and am pregnant with my second child. Not a day goes by that I regret my decision to not have that baby. It wasn’t the right thing for me and who knows where I would be right now. Instead I will have two children who are loved and cared for and wanted.
I don’t necessarily tell everyone about my abortion, but its also not a secret. My husband knows and maybe one day my children will know.
What I am certain of is that it was my decision and it was the right one for me. All women should have the choice to make this decision and should never have to feel guilt or regret!